Cappuccino

This morning:

Barista at Costa Coffee: "Would you like chocolate on that?"

Me: "Fzzzzt! Spt! Mmmph! You will remember that not 2 minutes ago I asked for a cappuccino. It's called a cappuccino because the brown top is the same as the brown robes worn by Cappuchin Friars. You, of all people, should know this. If you're going to blunder around drenching the little bits of poetry in life with the lukewarm cow-piss showers of your bovine ignorance - well - it's not very good is it? Yes - I would like fucking chocolate on it!"

Actually - I just smiled and said "Yes please". But I like to think she knew what I meant.